I wrote these two poems back in November 2003 when my back was really very bad, as in needing a stick to walk even on a goodish day 
I looked them out and decided to post them because my back was bad this morning. I’m normally stiff and sore when I wake up but this morning I broke into a sweat, I was hurting so much, just getting downstairs to the loo! Between waking up at 06:30 and leaving the house at 07:55 I’d taken my ibuprofen (asap) and my co-codamol at 07:40 when I was still in great pain. If it’s bad I am supposed to alternate them as the co-codamol is for the pain and the ibuprofen helps the pain but is more to reduce the inflamation.
It’s been niggling me all day but I’ve managed to refrain from taking any more medication, I still remember how chuffed I was the first day I didn’t need any after maxing out of both virtually every day for so long!
My back is still sore, it’s voice is getting louder , so I’m going to take some ibuprofen before I go to bed but considering I am up and down stairs fairly often throughout the day at school I am well chuffed with myself … back in the baddest back days I’d not have been able to work in this school because I wouldn’t have been able to cope with all the stairs … true I’ve avoided bending down as much as possible today but I’m still (though in pain) chuffed 
~ this is me determined to be more positive lol
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Dream night; Dream dark
Dream the pain away
Death is dark; Death’s at night
Death means the end to pain
~
Pain enduring; Pain forever
Pain past consciousness
Drugs only stop Pain for a little while
But Pain will stop at Death!
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Heart’s ease pain stops
But drugs don’t last forever
Cure the cause NOT the symptoms
… Ah well … worth a try.
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both by me 30/11/03
Dear Willow,
I like you poem “Back Pain” poem.
I am working in a pharma company with strong pain relievers as the main products. As a pain company, we have a strong advocacy towards proper pain management and as part of this, we annually create a planner and calendar which we intend to distribute free to doctors who are managing patients in pain. The planner and calendar include poems and quotations about pain and pain relief as a way of reminding our doctors of the need to treat pain and provide pain relief.
I came across your poem and I’d like to ask permission to include this in the planner/calendar? Rest assured that the contents will not be altered and that the poem will be properly credited to you. Thanks so much.
Ellaine
Thank you for the compliment, yes you may. If possible I’d love a copy, I’ve never been published in anything before.
Willow
Thanks you for this, Willow. Will work on it. I hope that you are not in pain anymore. Have good days ahead.
Ellaine
Has your back pain improved any since abandoning your weight?? As you know I had a
similar problem – and had got to the point where I was eyeing up invalid scooters with envy! While I could function okay at work I would work later and later because I would dread the walk from my third floor office to the car park two streets away – I would count the steps and promise myself “just another 50″ … “just another 20″ etc … and then have to slump in the driver’s seat for 10mins or so to recover from the pain and exertion! Like you I would reach for the painkillers on waking in order to get out of bed and would avoid walking any distance at all costs – and I too had got myself a collapsible stick – Now two and half stones lighter and I am mobile again without pain and the stick is redundant! I hope you get the same relief as the lbs drop off! Mags x
Hiya Magrat, it’s heaps better thanks. Had a couple of months of a different but equally agonising back pain due to emergency breaking incident. No crash, just breaking but my body hadn’t adjusted to the change in balance yet & it had a bad effect on my back. Thanks to my osteopath I’m a lot better again now